<![CDATA[Dharmaclock - Blog]]>Wed, 05 Apr 2023 18:49:52 -0700Weebly<![CDATA[Wallace... August 2004-November 2014]]>Mon, 21 Dec 2015 22:17:29 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/wallace-august-2004-november-2014On November 2014 I had to make one of the most heart wrenching and difficult periods of my life. Wallace passed away. I wasn't able to discuss it with anyone other than my mom because it was too painful to think about. I tried but each time tears poured out just mentioning his name. I have never in my life have had such a bond and been closer to any dog more than I have with Wallace. 
I love and miss him dearly. 

Here is what I wrote last year about him in support group for dogs with DM.

Last year my Irish Wolfhound, Wallace was diagnosed with Degenerative Myelopathy or DM as it is commonly referred as. Initially it was difficult to hear but I grudgingly accepted it. Part of me was relieved that it wasn't Osteosarcoma like my previous Wolfe Nelly developed since that was very devastating to her body. I figured Wallace could still live a healthy life despite the mobility in his legs when they stopped functioning properly. I didn't truly understand the progressive nature of this disease. I thought he would only develop paralysis in his hind legs. I took him back to see the Vet in August shortly after his 10th birthday since he developed more symptoms. The Vet said he was surprised Wallace has lived this long with DM which really shocked me. 

The DM has spread to his larynx and esophagus. Now he throws up most of what he eats despite his healthy appetite and the amount of food he consumes. Over the course of a year Wallace went from weighing 160lbs (which is was already lean for a dog his height; 36" tall from shoulders) to 125lbs now. He can’t bark anymore although he rarely barked anyway. When he tries it sounds like a bird chirping. Also he has difficulty in breathing in which some of that could be because of his Atrial Fibrillation. Despite his physical malfunctions, mentally he is very alert and happy. He tries to run outside with my mom’s pugs when they start barking at the neighbors. Of course he falls and stumbles as his hind legs are very weak. You can see the look in Wallace’s eyes that he is confused by what is happening to him.

I decided that next week I am going to take Wallace to the park which is his favorite place to explore one last time before going to the Vet to put him to sleep. I feel very conflicted about this decision. Part of me understands that he doesn't have much longer for a quality life and that this needs to be done sooner than later. The other side of me sees that his personality that has not deteriorated. He is happy and full of the normal curiosity that a dog possess. He still waits for me at the door when I come home from work. I want him around longer for my own selfish reasons, that he makes me happy and that I love him.
I struggle with this decision more than have with any other dog I owned.

​Thank you for letting me get this out of my head.

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]]><![CDATA[Basement Makeover]]>Fri, 24 Oct 2014 19:58:17 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/basement-makeoverIn July I sold my old house and bought a new one. I am renovating the new house to convert the basement into a separate functional and livable area. I am very excited to have this opportunity to create something wonderful.

The basement makeover is coming along very nicely. In a few more weeks the painting and trim will be completed. I created a section with photos and descriptions of this project. I will try my best to add more photos and description of the process soon as get more free time. 

It is a good feeling to see all the hard work develop into a tangible goal you can be proud of accomplishing.
This has been the largest home project I've ever done and learned more than i could imagine during this process.]]><![CDATA[House sold!]]>Wed, 23 Jul 2014 20:43:31 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/house-soldFinally! My house sold! After 14 years my former house has new owners. It is a good feeling to move on from that. Although I had lots of wonderful memories there, the time to forward has begun.  Now I just have two properties left to sell. :) With this one behind me I am more confident on the process that will lead to the others to be sold.
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]]><![CDATA[Are you who you want to be?]]>Sat, 19 Jul 2014 20:36:50 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/are-you-who-you-want-to-be The second annual Fit4Life- a 12 Week Challenge has officially begun!

Woohoo! We have nine participants this year! Which up from last year’s 12 week challenge of four.

I want to personally thank everyone for showing up to participate! Despite the dark dreary rainy weather we had fun!

The 12 week challenge is a small sacrifice of your time to improve your health and wellbeing. I was speaking with a co-worker about my health plan and how I would work towards achieving my goals. He asked me why I wouldn’t be playing any games with our group of friends during the 12 week challenge.  I told him during the competition I was going to be very focused and goal oriented until it was over.  It’s not that I don’t enjoy spending time with my friends doing fun activities; but right now, this is event my priority.

Too often we make excuses why we can’t do something then those justifications are full-filled. I want to go eat out with my friends and family, therefore I don’t have time. I need to relax at home after a long day at work, I don’t like going to the gym because it is boring. There can be a thousand different reasons why you can’t do something but never one motive as to why you can. That is why the 12 weeks is so important to me. No more excuses or delays as to why I can’t be healthier. We can all wish to be healthy but unless you are willing to do something about it, poor health will never change.  I want to be the man I dream about becoming. I want to achieve a healthy sustainable lifestyle that is flexible and fun. I am truly excited by this process and believe in it. For me, I generally prefer to exercise with others. I push myself harder and stay motivated longer. Whereas I hear some people say they prefer to exercise alone but then don’t hold themselves accountable to exercise and to eat clean. So for 12 weeks, put aside your excuses. Put aside your past disappointment. Put aside the negativity. If you can’t give yourself the best effort, for 12 weeks, then how can you expect to do it for 52 weeks the rest of your life?

Have fun! Rock on! And I will congratulate proudly all my brothers and sisters that complete this journey we shared in together!

This is your life! Make the best of it!



]]><![CDATA[The Challenge of Growth]]>Sun, 13 Jul 2014 14:48:33 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/the-challenge-of-growth One week from Saturday, I will start the Fit4Life 12 week fitness competition.

When I look back on where I was during the last fitness competition in 2013 and how I ended up; I am no longer in the same place physically. In fact since that time I have lost all the progress I fought so hard to accomplish during those 12 weeks. Shortly after the event I became ill on several different occasions. Each time I thought the ordeal was over and I could move on, I got hit again with another setback. At first when I started to think about all that happened, I became disappointed. A negative inner monologue about how and why developed. It was almost as if I was being scolded by an angry lover. A dark cloud rose over me as these thoughts continued.

After a moment or two of these assertions I said, “Hey! Wait a minute!” “I may fall down, I but I always pull myself back up! “I have setbacks, but I always start over.”  It’s not how many times we get hit by life or how hard; it’s about standing tall again and not letting anything keep you down in the mud. The Sun then appeared and swept away the dark inner monologue.

No matter how many disappointments, failures or setbacks; I will do something about it.

]]><![CDATA[Passacaglia]]>Sun, 23 Feb 2014 03:48:10 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/passacaglia There must be someone around willing to go.
I’ve had too much amber drink, but need more
She doesn’t know how to birth

Sit and drink my time like my value
Too many herbs, how absurd
This has to be a joke

The false prophet is audacious
It’s not the splendor in the message being told ,
It’s the words that never grow old

No reason to mourn, life will go on.
All the women vanished, and the mothers too

I can hear no sorrow in the distance
Two wolfs will meet once again
Michael remembers the gold.

]]><![CDATA[Home for sale]]>Wed, 08 Jan 2014 01:21:49 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/home-for-saleI finally have my home listed for sale!

My information is listed here.




]]><![CDATA[Home Repairs]]>Wed, 08 Jan 2014 01:20:18 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/home-repairsWhy can't my house be like a self-cleaning oven? Wouldn't it be great to flip a switch and a cute little robot maid glides out with a large glowing smile.

I am currently in the process of getting my home ready to list for sale. I never realized how much work would be necessary until I started looking at another house to buy.

When I first bought my home I was very excited and the prospect of working on it, doing my own repairs, and updates. Now I have very little interest after coming home from work doing any house related work. It is not that I am lazy, but rather my priorities have changed since I first purchased it 15 years ago.
Now when i get home I am very eager to pursue my hobbies.  My book, digital projects, traveling, exploring more of life. 

Is it possible for this to change again in 15 years? Absolutely! I have already started to think about building a home but know that is far into the future.]]><![CDATA[Meditation]]>Tue, 20 Aug 2013 02:01:11 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/meditationMeditation breaks apart the mental chains that lock our mind and bodies into rigid little square donut boxes.

It allows us to transcend our earthly thoughts and desires. Leave your ego at the door. Move on through to the other side and reconnect with your true self.  We are so much more than cells, atoms and randomly firing neurons. 
 
I recently started back again with my meditation every night before I go to bed. In the past when I meditated I focused solely on the breathing and imagery. This time I added relaxation music. All I can say is, Wow! What
originally took 10-15 minutes to achieve bliss now takes about 6-8 minutes to reach the sweet spot! If you have never mediated before I highly recommend giving it a try with music! 

There are many different types of relaxation and mediation music. There is no right or wrong tune to play. Pick one and experiment. For example I generally like space electronic sounds while other times really enjoy more
Tibetan flutes or Native American instruments. It may sound strange but each one affects me in a slightly different way.

 “All are one”

]]><![CDATA[Promises]]>Fri, 12 Jul 2013 16:28:08 GMThttp://www.dharmaclock.com/blog/promises
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