What do cupcakes and ex’s have in common? A lot! Let me
Eating sugary treats on an empty stomach has always made me sick. Recently I ate a few cupcakes for breakfast and didn’t feel well afterwards. So, why would I eat them on an empty stomach when I know I will feel bad afterwards?
The answer is simple: I love Cupcakes!
Let’s start this with another question. Is it possible to remain friends with someone that you once were intimate with after the relationship ends? I have met a few women in my life that remained friends with their ex’s
despite my disbelief it was possible. In my past experience and disappointment it never has turned out positive. The last woman I dated; however, caused me to reexamine my belief system on remaining friends with ex’s. It caused me to rethink if it could be possible but even if was, the more importantly question
was “should I?”
My last relationship ended as amicable as possible as could be expected from a break up. I still care for her well-being and miss the long talks we had together (although it was mostly her talking since I am the quiet one.). I had difficulty letting go because of the strong feelings and the wonderful moments we shared together which were hard to forget. I learned a lot from this woman. How often can you truly say that about someone you date? I met her at a crucial point in my life when my frustrations were high and my hope was depleted. She restored my faith in what it meant to be in love and that it was possible to find someone which a strong connection could be established despite the obstacles between us.
Realistically I can see that as two people separate and forms new lives sometimes the old ones fade away. This is the natural course and yet I still want to hold onto that special friend that gave me so
At first glance it seems like a nice idea, to remain friends with an ex-lover because you shared a good portion of your life with them and separated peacefully. In some form that love we shared will always exist. How
many of us can even say we ended a relationship without hurt and anger? Of course reality and my imagination are often on two different paths far apart as my parents consistently reminded me
There is a potential dark side to remaining friends with your ex-lover. As time passes, those good memories that were once special slowly start to erode and become replaced with something new. Those passionate moments will be gradually filled with new and unpleasant thoughts. You Ex no longer call as often with the sweet words that once made your heart skip a beat so you become resentful. Their thoughts and future plans
are towards someone else that doesn’t involve you. Although you genuinely want them to be happy, it is difficult when your ex talks about loving a new person. Or maybe one person wants to get back together while the other has permanently moved on.
It is painful to lose someone that you love but even more painful to stay with someone that no longer wants to love you in the way you have grown to expect.
If you read my previous blogs you will understand the power of closing doors and the psychological impact it has on us when we try to shut one.
I realized, I didn’t want to give up an Ex I loved despite the stomachache I got from it. There was always a small amount of hope we would rekindle the connection. Sometimes the things we love the most aren’t good for us; like eating cupcakes on an empty stomach for breakfast.
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." ~ Maya Angelou